Long before the internet and gay dating apps came into existence, gay bars perfected the art of creating safe spaces for the queer community. Unlike in the past, when gay bars were hidden, modern queer bars are as common as any mainstream bars in most countries.
Whether looking to get wasted, relax, meet new people, or enjoy queer-friendly entertainment, gay bars are the safest place for LGBTQ+ people to have fun. As long as you maintain a respectful presence, you can hang out in a gay bar regardless of your sexual orientation.
Going to a gay bar can be scary, especially if you are a baby gay or it’s your first time exploring gay nightlife. Fortunately, with proper preparation, you can have an exhilarating time cruising a gay bar. Continue reading to learn more about how to have a good time in gay bars.
Gay Bars Crush Course: Here is what you need to know
You finally hit that magic age when you can legally hit your favorite gay bar, and you are bubbling up with excitement. Finally, you can drink all the fruity drinks you want, dance, flirt, and connect with other gay people, something you have been looking forward to all your life.
But as much as you are excited, you can also be nervous, which is understandable. Gar bars host some of the coolest people in the gay community. What if you act daft or look like an idiot when you visit a gay bar for the first time?
Fortunately, we have prepared a comprehensive guide to help you have a seamless time visiting a gay bar. Here is what to know:
· Define your purpose but have an open mind
Are you the type of man who stumbles into things or places without a plan? If you are, that’s all good and dandy, but you must leave that attitude at home when visiting a gay bar for the first time. Your first time going to a gay bar can be an exhilarating experience if you plan it properly.
Self-evaluate to know what you want to gain from going to a gay bar because clubbing is a personal experience. A person can go to a club purely to find hookup partners or dance. Luckily, gay clubs have a wide assortment of activities you can do.
From sampling drinks, drag shows, dating, and indoor shows to enjoying the lovely ambiance, gay clubs have loads of fun things you can do to have a great time.
· Research gay bars closer to you
Your first time in a gay bar is akin to a religious or sexual experience too special to squander. Don’t just wake up on a typical Monday and raid the first gay bar you come across. You can enhance your first gay balance by doing some research on friendly clubs you can visit around your neighborhood.
The last thing you need is to stumble into a gay club that serves substandard liquor, breaks out in fights, and has cheesy décor. You can check local gay bar reviews on socials, get recommendations from friends, or stalk (respectively) places where the hottest gay guys hang out.
Don’t forget to check the privacy and safety considerations when scoping out your local nightlife. For instance, you can check if a potential gay bar has a history of dragging its patrons or rampant cases of pickpocketing. Go to a gay club that has invested in security measures such as security guards, bouncers, and CCTV footage.
If you are in the closet, consider hanging out in a gay bar that is a bit further from your home. Even if it’s not explicitly talked about, local people might be aware it’s a gay bar, so you might want to look further.
· Turn heads with your outfit
How do you know what to wear to a gay club? Do you steal ideas from magazines and runways or listen to your favorite influence? Your first impression at a gay club is important, so dress like the star you are. Don’t just wear something because it is in your closet or is the most expensive apparel you own.
Wear something exciting, mysterious, adventurous, and comfortable that makes you feel like a million bucks. So, what exactly should you wear to a gay club? Well, it depends on your objectives. If you are going to a gay bar to dance, consider wearing comfortable clothes that allow free movement.
If going to a theme party, get a fit made of leather or silicone for their realistic aesthetics. Gay clubs can be sweaty and overcrowded, so go for something airy that reduces sweating.
If you are not sure what to wear to your first gay club, consider wearing something simple, comfortable, and stylish. A smart casual look gives you a perfect look in a club. You can wear a white t-shirt with jeans or chinos, black boots, and a dark blazer and finish the look with moderate accessories such as a watch or chain.
Stick to dark colors for your pants and blazers or jackets because they are perfect for concealing light stains. With flowing drinks, dancing, and indoor games, gay clubs can be chaotic, so wearing dark colors keeps you looking neat all night.
· Watch your alcohol at gay bars
Bars are synonymous with alcohol, so going to a gay bar will obviously expose you to liquor. Contrary to what teetotallers or religious fanatics will have you believe, alcohol is not bad. You can drink alcohol but do it in moderation.
Gay bars have the finest collection of alcohol and professional staff that is skilled in making various drinks. Whether you prefer your drinks in a lowball glass, jigger, or beer bottle, gay bar bartenders will sort you out.
Gay bars are similar to straight bars when it comes to safety and security. Don’t take drinks from a stranger, never leave your liquor unattended, and always pay close attention to your surroundings. Drink in a way that does not bring shame to you or the gay community.
The last thing the gay community needs is a drunken gay man T-boning and killing people on his way from a gay club. Drink responsibly. Don’t be the guy who guzzles down beer like the world is ending tomorrow. Alcohol is meant to be savored, and you can only do that when you drink in moderation.
· It’s home to all
A gay bar is a home for all, regardless of age, as long as they are of legal age and sound mind. Most gay bars have customers of different ages, races, sexual orientations, and economic backgrounds. Don’t be surprised if you walk into a gay bar and see a 90-year-old man hitting the dance floor like it’s 1975.
In a gay club, it’s common to find people of different ages and races sharing drinks and engaging in activities that suggest they share body fluids. If it’s your first time going to a gay bar, observe without staring, enquire without interrogating, and let people have a good time without judging.
A gay bar attracts all sorts of social outcasts, so be ready to interact with a comical mixture of people. From drug kings, twinks, bears, closeted gays, lesbians, Trans, leather daddies, and questioning to intersex people, gay bars have a fantastic mixture of patrons. It’s a place to congregate, share ideas, relax, build relationships, and socialize, so go with an open mind.
Gay clubs are successful because they maintain the privacy and anonymity of people who don’t want to come out publicly. If you see a famous actor, singer, athlete, or influencer having a good time at a gay bar, don’t rush to snap a pic to post to your socials. Give people their privacy, and they will return the favor.
· Have fun but remain hawk-eyed
If the Pulse nightclub shooting taught the queer community anything, it is to be vigilant always. Even if you have never experienced anything of such magnitude, being vigilant can save your life or health. Not every reveler that throws a smile your way has your best interest at heart.
Like any other bars, gay bars are full of people with ill intentions. The person drinking a beer next to you might be a predator waiting for you to get tipsy to lure you to your doom. You could be dancing with a rapist or sharing a table with a radicalized killer, so always try your best to read the room.
Keep a keen eye on your drinks, and if you leave them unattended even for seconds, get a new one. If you suspect you have been dragged or something is amiss, get help from a bartender, bouncer, or someone you are confident works at the bar.
· Manage your expectations at gay bars
If you have spent ages dreaming about your first gay bar experience, your expectations might be so high that the actual experience seems underwhelming. Manage your expectations by having an open mind, allowing you to have fun in whatever environment you are in.
Gay bars provide safe places for queer people to meet, socialize, build a community, share ideas, and have a good time. While gay bars are amazing, they can be a tad intimidating, especially for someone who has never been to one before. Luckily, with this simple guide, you can have a fun outing exploring your local gay nightlife.