What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word daddy? Gay men with a healthy obsession with leather? Older gay with deep pockets ready to spoil you to your heart’s content? Visit sites like Tinder, Grindr, or Adam4Adam, and you will find men of varying ages, races, and body types identifying as daddies on their profiles. Unlike in the past when the term daddy referenced a person’s age, the term daddy has gained a broader meaning in the gay community. In this article, we will discuss what a gay daddy is, the types of daddies, their challenges, and the advantages of identifying as one.
What does it mean to be a gay daddy?
How do you know you are a gay daddy? Unlike in the past when age was the only criterion for becoming a daddy, many factors can make you a daddy. Since there is no specific definition of what a gay daddy is, a daddy can be anyone regardless of age, race, personality, or body type. A gay daddy is a person with a hot body, emotional intelligence, sexual experience, mental strength, and leadership ability, and can offer direction and guidance in a relationship.
In the loose sense of the word, a gay daddy is a muscular man who takes up a mentor/parental /counsellor role in a relationship. Often than not, the daddy is perceived to be the aggressor in the relationship taking charge of decisions in and outside the bedroom.
Different types of gay daddies
Are you aware there are different types of daddies in the gay community? Yep! Leave it to the gays to come up with all kinds of cutesy names to describe ridiculously hot men.
Different types of daddies in the gay community include:
A zaddy is a hot gay man with a strong fashion sense. A zaddy is someone with a hot body and a lot of swag. He can pull off any fashion style and make it look like he invented it. Zaddies are more like daddies but with a better fashion sense. Think Adam Rodriguez and Zayn Malik kind of looks. Zaddies have the body, face, talent, and fashion sense to make them a hot commodity in the gay scene.
· Dad I’d Like to Fuck (DILF)
Gay dads are sexy, so it’s not surprising if you have a crush on one or two around your neighborhood. Dad I’d Like to Fuck can be a gay dad that you would love to get down and dirty with because they are hot and is an amazing father. A good example of DILF is Anderson Cooper, who is sexy, successful, smart, and makes fatherhood seem like a dream job.
A daddy is a good-looking gay man that likes to take charge in and outside the bedroom. While the term daddy referenced an older gay man in the past, it has recently gained a broader meaning encompassing men of different age groups.
· Gay Dad
Gay dad, shortened to just day, can have two interpretations. A dad can refer to the father-the person that made you or played a parental role in your journey to adulthood. A dad can also refer to someone you respect who has greatly impacted your life. For instance, as a young gay man, you can call an older gay man dad as a sign of respect and appreciation for their contribution to the gay community.
Things to look for in a gay daddy
While the term daddy traces its roots to the leather community and the porn industry, it has gained a broader and more meaningful meaning in the gay community. Since there is no universal definition of who a gay dady is, it’s up to individuals to find a personalized experience that reflects their relationship. If you are looking for a gay daddy, here are some things to look for to find someone amazing:
· Sexual experience
Daddy-boy relationships have one significant dynamic that makes them different from other relationships. In a gay daddy-boy relationship, one partner, usually the dominant partner, has more sexual experience than the submissive partner. Like most sexual things in the gay community, daddy-boy relationships have a kinky element, so it pays to have a sexual partner skilled in the bedroom to teach you.
When searching for a gay daddy with sexual experience, avoid focusing too much on the number of years the person has been sexually active. You can find a twenty years old with more sexual experience than a 40-year-old gay man. Ideally, go for someone with more sexual experience and who is willing to keep learning new sexual tricks to make your sex life exciting.
· Financial stability
Can a relationship survive without money? Possible! But why would you start a relationship on such rocky ground? If you are looking for a gay daddy, at the very least, go for someone that can take care of his financial needs. Looks mean nothing when you keep getting thrown out because you didn’t pay rent or sleeping hungry. I’m not saying he should be Anderson cooper or Elon musk rich, but he should be financially stable.
· Emotional intelligence
A daddy that knows how to approach different situations is hot because he makes it safe to be around him. The last thing you need in a boy-daddy relationship is a hothead who makes decisions without thinking about your physical and mental well-being. A daddy that has mastered his emotions knows how to cater to your needs, allowing you to have a stress-free relationship. Go for someone who constantly checks on you to ensure you are okay.
Find a gay daddy that shares your sexual interests or is willing to explore your interests. If you want your relationship to flourish, it’s crucial to have sexual intimacy, which can only be enhanced by sharing the same sexual interests. If you like kinky sex, go for a daddy with an open mind to kinky sex. Better yet, go for someone in the kink community because they have already learned the ABCs of the world of kink.
Dating someone who shares your sexual interests ensures that you are comfortable with the type of sex you have, making it less likely you will be pressured to try things that bring you shame or pain. For instance, if you prefer vanilla sex, find a gay daddy that will fulfill your vanilla sexual needs rather than bullying you to try hardcore BDSM activities.
What is a daddy-boy relationship?
A daddy-boy relationship involves one dominant partner who enjoys taking control of the relationship and a submissive partner who readily trusts the dominant partner. Contrary to popular belief, the submissive partner is not a doormat without ideas, choices, or direction. In a daddy-boy relationship, the dominant partner takes on the role of a mentor or parental-like guidance to help the submissive partner seamlessly breeze through life.
A daddy can be someone younger, an age-mate, or someone older. Some men prefer romantic relationships with someone considerably younger or older than them, whether through unconscious selection, fetish, or slim pickings in their dating age brackets. If you are an older gay man and prefer dating younger men, you may have what is known as a daddy-boy relationship. You can have a daddy-boy relationship if you want someone to mentor and share the knowledge you have gained through experience.
Gay daddy struggles – understand the struggles gay daddies face
Being gay can be tough, depending on your environment, upbringing, and personality. Gay daddies, like most people in the queer community, face challenges on a daily basis.
Some struggles that gay daddies experience include:
Stereotypes harm individuals because they create a perception that a person has to behave a certain way to fit in. A common stereotype is that daddies are older gay men that prefer dating younger men. While it’s true that some gay daddies are older, that doesn’t mean you have to be above a certain age to identify as a daddy.
· Expectations vs. reality
Wearing a daddy label in a relationship comes with certain expectations that can put too much pressure on a person sucking the joy out of a relationship. As a daddy, you are expected to have more sexual experience, give direction, support your partner, have a successful career, and generally have your life figured out. You can feel intimidated if you have not achieved some of the expectations that people have attached to your identity.
How do you prepare for the challenges ahead?
The best way to prepare for challenges you will face as a gay daddy is to expect the unexpected. Being a daddy is a personal experience, and you are going to face personalized challenges. Expecting the unexpected ensures that nothing can surprise you as you explore your identity as a gay daddy.
Advantages of being a gay daddy
Gay daddies have become popular in the last few years. Some advantages of being a gay daddy include the following:
- Freedom to experience life in your truest form.
- Ability to have a healthy relationship with sexual partners that share your interests.
Gay daddies are an essential part of the gay community. The daddy identity has evolved over the years to represent a broader category of gay men, including men of different ages, body types, and races.